Three words have come to my attention as of late because they’re totally messing with my manifesting powers. To put it bluntly, “can’t” and “should” and “hate” are not serving how I want to be. If you can relate to the not-so-feel-good consequences of certain words that you’d rather get OUT of your life, this is my love letter to you.
“It is not about controlling your thoughts, it is about guiding your thoughts more in the direction you are wanting to go in.” — Abraham-Hicks
Words are just words. Words are powerful. Both statements are true and, like most things in this life, we must learn how to honor the balance. I have three words in particular that I am in the process of releasing because they just don’t serve where and how I want to be; I’d like to share them with you so that something new can come through—maybe, for the both of us.
In essence, this is what’s going on right now: I’m getting what I don’t want inside of me anymore OUT. If I get it out, then I can look it right in the eye. Same goes for you.
What chaos needs to go? First, you’ve got to know it’s there. Then you can release it on purpose (preferably, in a healthy way, like writing or running). Now you can look at it and decide if you want to take it back or let it go and move in another direction.
You know that as you contemplate what’s got to go and what can stay that you are the one in charge, right? Mindfulness puts you in the position of power; no old thoughts or negative thinking can suck you in when you’re the one observing them.The right choice of words can either stifle creativity or serve possibility. Click To Tweet
Here’s what I mean by this: a self-depreciating word or phrase can keep you from believing in yourself and cut you off from your potential. On the other hand, an empowering mantra leaves more room for growth and possibility.
If we want a good life full of experiences and relationships that we love, we need to stop allowing negative and cynical thinking to drain our energy and cut us off from our possibilities.
I am releasing three words this year because they have proven themselves to be destructive towards the positive experiences that I’m trying to create for myself, and for those around me. And since acknowledgment and acceptance of what hurts is just the first step to releasing it, I’m going to share positive alternatives for each word to inspire us both to focus on what we want to create.
If you want to let something go, you have to see it for what it is first—but you can’t stay there, focusing on the very thing you don’t want. You look at it to let it go and then you start prioritizing thoughts and feelings that are linked to the reality you do want to create.
Just a Few Words I’d Rather Replace Than Repeat…
The word “should” is pretty arrogant and ignorant because it bases its demands on the severely limited view that life is inherently wrong. Who am I to declare that life is wrong? I can create change from this point forward, surely, but doing so from a place of shame or mistrust is like asking for more trouble.
When someone tells you that you should do, have, or be something else, how does it make you feel?
When you tell someone that they should do, have, or be something else, how does that make you feel?
Just think about each question. Think about how different perspectives grant different experiences. “Should” shrinks our options, narrows our view, and has a way of making us feel less-than in some way. That’s just my experience, anyway.
Positive, productive alternatives:
- Right now is my place of power. Right now, I can…
- Luckily, I’m not General Manager of the universe.
- I am learning to embrace the mysterious ways things fall into place, in their own time.
- I am enough.
- I respect the process of all things and stay open to new opportunities.
- Why do I want to do this particular thing?
- I acknowledge and accept my past reality and start fresh in the present moment to contribute to a new reality.
Can’t is a particularly restricting contraction. (Try to say that five times fast.)
In my personal experiences, I’ve seen that the word “can’t” usually signifies: something I don’t really (really) want to do; an opinion that lacks true, objective evidence; or doubt that began a long time ago.
Saying “I can’t” never feels good. Saying “It’s not a priority right now” or “I don’t want to” feels better, probably because it’s closer to the truth. Even if it doesn’t feel that much better, at least it leaves room for something else.
Positive, productive alternatives:
- I can figure this out.
- I am ready to learn and grow.
- I believe in what’s possible.
- I don’t…
Watch this video with Marie Forleo on breaking bad habits and how one word can change your whole approach.When it comes to breaking a bad habit, set yourself up for success by saying “I don't” instead of “I can't.” @MarieForleo Click To Tweet
Yuck. I’m not even going to write this word again because it can be a powerful driving force for the exact opposite of the experience I want to create.
If you want to love your life, love what you do, and love who you are, you need to focus on love.
Positive, productive questions:
- What do I love?
- What can I do/contribute?
- What can I change?
- What do I want to see flourish?
- How can I learn to bring a different energy to this?
- Imagine that you’re a magnet and you’re attracting more of the way you feel. Are the words you’re speaking contributing to the way you want to feel or repelling the feelings you want to experience more of?
- What words/phrases are not serving who/how/what you’d like to be? Don’t just leave it there, though! Share one positive, productive alternative that feels more aligned with what you’re trying to create for yourself.
Please share your thoughts, words, alternatives, and inspiring stories with me in the comments.
Did a light bulb turn on? Share that light with someone else; send these ideas to a friend who’s trying to create a positive experience.
Believe in what you CAN do. Believe in what you love. Believe in the power of your focus.