One of the greatest struggles you may ever face is the challenge to love yourself just as you are. To some it comes easier, but for many of us it’s not a piece of cake (though it can bring so much sweetness into our lives, if we just vow to keep showing up for ourselves). Here are ten simple ways to love yourself and be genuine about it.
“Let today be the day you love yourself enough to no longer just dream of a better life; let today be the day you act upon it.” – Steve Maraboli
The challenge is not to love (self-love is natural, self-loathing is learned) but to break down all the walls we have built to keep love limited.
When you muster the courage to push through these walls and love yourself—to know and embrace yourself, despite your humanness, flaws, and rejections—you open the door to connecting to yourself and others in more caring, compassionate, and intimate ways.The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself. – Maya Angelou Click To Tweet
There are countless ways to love yourself, and more reasons than can be counted. Below are ten practices that, if coming from a genuine place in your heart, will help you love yourself so fiercely, that when others see you they know exactly how it should be done.
10 Little Ways to Love Yourself Like You Really, Really Mean it
1. Tell yourself that you ARE enough.
Actually say it: “I Am Enough.”
When you feel like you aren’t enough, tell yourself that you are. Repeating this positive affirmation to yourself will help instill a sense of love and acceptance in your mind. The message behind these simple words might need a little time and repetition to sink in, but they will.
Don’t hide from your mistakes and don’t lie about your past, but do approach them with compassion. A mistake is a lesson, not a sentence. Not one human being on this planet has never made a mistake, but they are no less lovable because of it.
Flawed people are beautiful. Genuine people are beautiful. You are beautiful and teachable. You are enough. Give yourself credit for what you are instead of discrediting yourself for what you aren’t.
You are whole even when you feel empty; you’re on the path of wholeness, of learning how whole you are underneath all the perceived pieces of yourself.
2. Favor the belief that you carry infinite potential to overcome.
Whatever you’re dealing with right now, know that you’re eternally equipped with the capacity to transcend the suffering that so often follows the initial bout of pain. We all experience difficulties, but it’s how we deal with life’s challenges that determines how abundant we feel.
Emotional discomfort will come and go like the changing seasons. When accepted, you can use your discomfort to transform frustration into resilience, hatred into kindness, inexperience into awareness, and doubt into hope.You're an alchemist, powerful and born to create. Transformation is your destiny. Click To Tweet
Believe in your ability to climb over this wall, and believe you’re worthy enough to see what’s on the other side.
3. View yourself as a being on a path of continuous self-education.
One of the highest forms of self-love is the act of investing copious amounts of time and energy into improving oneself. You’re your own best investment, to be sure. The gifts you have to share can only grow when you do.
You’ve always done what you could do at that time with the knowledge you possessed. You’re always doing your best, and you’re encouraged to heal the parts of yourself that believe you’re on the wrong path, that you haven’t done what “should” have been done. Failure really translates to “moving forward with newfound wisdom.”
Once you hone your awareness of the fact that you’re on an ever-evolving path of expanding consciousness, you can open up your mind to receive what’s next for you, treasuring all opportunities to learn and grow.
4. Respect your inner longings (they are cues).
In the morning, ask yourself what’s really important to you, and then find the courage to build your day around your answer.
Devote your time and energy to nurturing your passions, signature strengths, and inner desires. Be honest about who you feel yourself to be and what you want to experience in this lifetime, and invest in the activities you deeply care about. This devotion supports a life that wholeheartedly feels like your own.A good life is about making the decision each day to do something that moves you. Click To Tweet
Doing things you care about is one of the most rewarding and life-giving ways to love yourself, and that kind of devotion is exactly what this world needs.
5. Value this moment; have reverence for the life that’s here.
One of the greatest presents you can give to yourself (and anyone you make contact with) is the gift of your own presence.
So much is lost if we don’t pay attention to life as we’re living it. The inability to focus in the present leads to a lack of awareness, which can lead to major challenges in communication, and therefore trouble in our most important relationships (including the one we keep with ourselves).
Self-awareness is a form of self-love. You can’t build a profound connection with anyone, including yourself, unless you’re fully engaged. Show up in your entirety, with mindful reverence for the life that’s being expressed right now; you’ll understand how empowering this can be.
6. Make conscious connections to your inner self.
Make honest contact with your inner world. In other words, pay more attention to what’s going on inside of you, and be honest with what you see. Meditation, self-reflection, journaling, massage, energy work, and therapy are all healthy forms of contemplation that can give you the chance to be quiet with yourself.
Any sense of insecurity, self-doubt, anxiety, or weakness that comes up represents disowned feelings from the past. Since you’re more than these lingering feelings, you can heal and learn to love yourself through the process of healing what’s calling for your attention.
7. Forgive your past self.
Good people make bad choices, yet everything contributes to the healing process. We don’t heal despite anything, but because of everything. We are human, therefore we stumble; we are human, and so we must learn.
Focus less on old news and pay more attention to what you’re going to start doing now. Carrying around resentment, bitterness, regret, and anger will only cause your happiness to slowly deteriorate (though it will never completely dissolve). What can be dissolved is the notion that you’re not good enough, or worthy enough to change your own life from this point forward.If it's healing you need, it's forgiveness that you need to allow. Click To Tweet
8. Be compassionate with your feelings.
Don’t avoid or dismiss what you’re feeling. Paying attention to your emotions is not soft or weak, but a necessary part of self-awareness and resounding joy.
Explore your feelings and listen to what they’re telling you. No emotion is right or wrong; it’s a guide. Emotional pain alerts you to something that needs to change, but judging yourself for feeling a certain way only causes you to feel rejected by yourself and keeps you stuck in that negative place.
9. Tell yourself that it’s really okay to not please everyone.
Not everyone will like you and understand you, and that’s okay. In fact, if you learn to expect and respect this, you will know what it feels like to be at peace with yourself regardless of the opinions of others (and that’s a really good feeling).No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. – Eleanor Roosevelt Click To Tweet
If you’re completely, unabashedly honest with yourself, you’ll know what you need to feel loved, and you’ll know that you have the final say in how loved you feel.
By approaching relationships from this place of self-respect and self-sufficiency, you can gently teach the people around you what you have to offer, and you’ll have enough sense to walk away from what doesn’t reflect your deepest desires and highest truths.
10. Take responsibility for the love you experience.
Expecting others to fill a perceived void within yourself is definitely not one of the most effective ways to love yourself. You can’t neglect yourself in hopes of someone else saving you, and end up feeling loved and lovable.
Try working from the inside out instead.
Try taking responsibility for yourself emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. Try taking responsibility for your happiness. Try taking responsibility for loving yourself, and you can better share that love with others and impact the world around you.The love that we are is the best gift we have to give. Click To Tweet
Honor your emotions, and you become a more powerful co-creator of your experiences—because you’re consciously directing your attention to what you prefer for your life. Take responsibility for how loved you feel, and you will know what true love is.
- How do you remind yourself that you’re good enough, resilient enough, and worthy enough to live a life you’re excited about?
- What challenges have you overcome that have led you to greater happiness and deeper love in the present?
Please share your positive thoughts, helpful insights you’ve picked up along the way, and any inspiring stories of self-acceptance and self-love with me in the comments.
Share this post with someone who could use a little more love today.
You’re worthy of your own love, because love is all-inclusive: it leaves no one out, not even you.